Wednesday, 29 June 2016


This is getting weird. So not myself to be updating my blog few times in one week. Usually it is once per year. But, whatever, just need some place to rant. Twitter is no longer fun, It limits the things that I can say as too many people were thinking that the tweets were for them gosh and it only allows 140 characters so it is not enough pfft. My tweets can be random and unpredictable sometimes so let me be.

Anyway, I am getting negative nowadays to the point I am scared of myself. I am not me anymore. I am terrified actually. But, I can't really ignore it though. My mind is in a mess right now. Can't help but thinking about it all the time. To go home or not to go home. Things will be so awkward, which house should I go first? I hate this. Please don't let me choose. Can I just run away from all these. Can I?

I know this time will come. The moment when I realized things would not be the same anymore. Ever. I am scared.


Monday, 27 June 2016

Oppa San

Hi! Surprise to see me?

Anyway, had a blast with my brother two days ago. He asked me to accompany him to the hospital to see his patient. Initially hesitated to say yes because I was having mild fever but I followed anyway.

But, to my surprise, after waiting for few hours in the waiting room in the hospital, he told me that we're going to the mall for Raya shopping after he finished with his works, wehoo! The trip to the mall was hella fun and I managed to get two new pants, two new kicks and one shirt. Life is good, life is good~

After that, we went to the spa(?), I don't really know how to describe the place, but we went for a massage session and yeah, I feel healthier. It was almost time for buka puasa but unfortunately we could not find any place, every restaurants were fully reserved so what do we do was that we bought juice and also some jagung in a cup and we sat at the chair near the toilet omg we were so pathetic. We were laughing and giggling because we found that situation so funny the whole time we sat there. After Maghrib prayer, we managed to get seated in one of the restaurants and after dinner we went home.

It was a simple, unplanned yet a fun day, to be able to talk in the car with him, making jokes and everything. He is going to get married soon hmm. Feel like I am losing one of my bestfriends tho. Hmm..

p/s: new blog address--, yeah I know, I need not your opinion on this, thank you


Tuesday, 21 June 2016



Hmm, this is surprisingly weird and terribly awkward. Haven't post anything in here since, I don't know maybe last year I guess. Last thing I remember was that I posted something like hmm nope don't remember anything. Whatever.

Anyway, I am in my final year, first semester now as a student in IIUM. Not exactly yet as the semester has not started (start in September fyi) but hey, I am freaking graduating next year. Who cares! Time sure flies. Been through ups and downs and downs and downsss all these while but, hey, I survived. God knows how much I was struggling to stay alive, yeah to stay alive. Suicidal thoughts? A close friend of mine. Depression? I don't know, probably my crush. Fake smile? My favorite outfit to be worn during the day. Shit, enough with all these, I am a positive person. I can do this. Gonna fake happiness till I really feel it.

What is life without drama right? I am happy studying while working now, yes working as a part timer does help to distract me from staying under those blanket of sadness. Money give happiness. Eh, no, scratch that. Money equals to food and food equals to happiness, yeah that is more like it. I am actually laughing right now because I think I am one hella funny person but to put "haha" at the end of my sentence is sort of weird. But still, know that I am actually laughing right now because I am funny, trust me.

I think that is enough for today, see ya when I see ya! Adios